Day 5 – After another straight 8 hours sleep & waking up naturally its breakfast time overlooking the mountains. Now I LOVE a breakfast buffet. So many options! Lefay certainly know how to do a breakfast. Breads, cakes (sugar free ones, or full fat – the sugar free olive oil cake is a revelation), fruits, fresh pressed juices on demand, prosecco (i love this idea), coffee to die for and of course – the view. How can I fail to be happy, I could stare at the view of the Lake & the Mountains all day long. I tuck in to my fresh carrot, apple, celery & ginger juice alongside my scrambled eggs & crispy procuttio, and something very strange happens. Im full half way through. Surely not, i haven’t even got to the cake yet??
Then I realise, this is how normal people eat. Is this what A normal healthy relationship with food is?
I guess it all stemmed from my youth. In my house I was not allowed to leave the table without clearing my plate. The prize was desert, Vienetta (80’s child), magic Ice on ice cream, choc ices, even just a few sweets from the out of reach sweet tin. I was brought up to never waste food as were most of my generation. Problem with that is I over eat. When my tummy is saying stop I’m not listening. That only happened when I moved out of home as I was buying my own food & my weight ballooned. I’ve battled it ever since.
Even in tough times when most people cant eat, id eat. Lots. It made me feel better. Then I’d feel guilty. I was never ill with it, but its always been a demon – & finally I have accepted that. Within a week of being here its sorted, under control & the weight is falling away slowly. Its not rocket science……
So now its the last confession – Alcohol. My job allows me to be extremely social which I love, & I thoroughly enjoy a drink. Nothing better than a cool glass of Rose, or a G& T – Its my way of letting off steam. But yet again i don’t know when to stop-especially over the last few years. I think nothing of once or twice a week getting drunk. Its so easy to leave the office & go to a bar within 100 yards. Sometimes I get so drunk I cant remember getting home. Ive only had 1 bad encounter from that, but I’ve lost phones, purses, various coats – & I still do it. Its even a regular occurrence that I am late for work, or work from home – the guilt then makes me work then longer, even over weekends.
Im by no means an alcoholic, I can go weeks without touching a drop, but I so don’t want to end up with liver problems like my Dad had. He never had a problem he just drank 2 drinks everyday. Doctors said to him you always need 2 clear days to every 1 day drinking. Im a classic binge drinker, I don’t drink at home usually, or very rarely at weekends.
It stops here.
So the week progresses – chats with the Doc, Pilates, training, & massages become my way to let off stresses & steam.
I can feel me becoming me again, but the balance is right – good food, good wine, quality of life.
Last night comes all too quickly & its the World cup final. The resort is half occupied with Germans so there is a strong support for them. The rest of the guests are rooting for Argentina (tough decision) but we all know Germany are just too damn good at the moment. I take my seat in amongst my Dortmund pals, & watch the tension build. They switch to drinking soft drinks – thats a revelation to me. So i join them, & have a thoroughly amazing evening with everyone there. I trot of to bed sober, calm & happy.
So its time to come home. Its time for a final chat with the Doctor. Ive really enjoyed my daily chats with him. Sometimes you need a stranger to put you back on track, to speak the truth. One of my favourite quotes from him “Alison, there are 3 billion men in this world, why do you not have one?” Point taken!! He gives me a 12 page letter to read when I get home. His parting quote “Alison- I have loved spending time with you, now learn to love spending time with you because you are with you 24/7.
The power of speech hey.
Although I’m sad to leave, i will be back. This is my happy place. Im looking forward to coming home & seeing all of my wonderful friends. This weekend we have a family wedding, time to celebrate!
On the plane I don’t have an alcoholic drink – I could, I just didn’t want one. Yay.
As the week progresses my diet stays stable, I’m exercising daily, sleeping well & I’m so so happy. I’m back! I’ve missed me. I know some of you have to, and I cant wait to see you all!!! Now, wheres my sun lounger & pot of tea……….