Rough, tough, week….
Day 5 – After another straight 8 hours sleep & waking up naturally its breakfast time overlooking the mountains. Now I LOVE a breakfast buffet. So many options! Lefay certainly know how to do a breakfast. Breads, cakes (sugar free ones, or full fat – the sugar free olive oil cake is a revelation), fruits, fresh pressed juices on demand, prosecco (i love this idea), coffee to die for and of course – the view. How can I fail to be happy, I could stare at the view of the Lake & the Mountains all day long. I tuck in to my fresh carrot, apple, celery & ginger juice alongside my scrambled eggs & crispy procuttio, and something very strange happens. Im full half way through. Surely not, i haven’t even got to the cake yet??
Well, where do I begin?
Saturday, 2.14am. Drip. Drip. Drip. Is it raining? Did i leave the window open? No, its raining through the ceiling downstairs. Ffs. So 2 hours later & astonishingly only £80 the leaks fixed. May as well get up as I’m off holiday clothes shopping!
Wow what a feeling. I woke up to natural sunlight, not the alarm… What a calming thing that is instead of being jolted awake by Tinie Tempahs song Frisky (although ‘would you risk it for a chocolate biscuit’ is the best lyric of all time). Its amazing how quickly the hours go just pottering around, going for a run, having a leisurely breakfast & its 1pm already. Aaarrrgghhh I have a appointment at 1.30-& now I’m back to running around… I guess i need to balance this relaxing stuff with normal life!!
After a fab Friday night catching up with a great bunch of friends over a huge G&T, its time to pack and sleep before the event of the week- HEN WEEKEND TIME!! With the car loaded with tunes & two of my amazing friends its off to Bristol we go!
After a leisurely drive down its cocktail making time. The Hen was the star of the show, it seems she is a natural! Shaking away, pulling off party tricks for a shot train (yes you heard me correctly), the girl did us all proud-its great to have a man free giggle every now and then. As the evening progressed the games continued-Mr & Mrs, guess the object (for adults only) & a game called never ever have I which was certainly an eye opener……
The evening progressed with more fun & games, with some fabulous dancing & strong drinking capabilities from the gang-my kind of night away!
After a nights sleep in concrete heaven lying next to Lenny Henry (a picture not the real one), its time for a large leisurely breakfast then the drive home. Thanks for the invite Hen, and thanks to all your friends for making it such fun!!
So its the start of my first week at home. Nothing in the diary. Zilch. Nada. No alarm clock, no timetable, no meetings or anything. My brain is beginning to relax very slowly, & its learning to love me again.
Despite that there are a few goals this week-watch a lot of tennis & world cup games, detox for 3 days on a juice only cleanse, join the local gym, change the broken lightbulbs, tidy the garden….. Phew!
The Detox starts well-6 bottles of juice a day. All delicious. So off I trot to the best hairdresser in West London to make me feel good-as always. The result is a very blonde & short cut this time strangely at my request. My hairdresser couldn’t believe it either when i said “cut it shorter, up to you”. I am such a control freak normally!!
Im learning slowly that a lot of my attitude is down to having to be in control. The irony is that makes me not in control! I guess because Ive been knocked down a few times, but the main factor is being an only child, your defences kick in a lot quicker-you are just used to doing things yourself, being in your own company, amusing yourself. When it goes wrong you take it on the chin & move on. So being a single female & also an only child is a double defence delight!!
Maybe thats one of the reasons I haven’t settled down. I have some great male friends, who always look out for me & some close ones – but I always just accept any situation, good or bad, & walk away not wanting to confront anyone. I let it bug me for ages. I don’t like confrontation until its too late, then I just take the blame, apologise & get on with it. Very English as i am told…That has to stop.
Guess Ive just not yet met the one who will tell me not to worry, give me a big hug & take the stress away whilst making me feel Like a princess. One day.
Day 2 of the detox & the headaches kick in, with the sore throat & aching. Here we go, you slow down & the germs invade…
I push on and go to join a new gym. Its amazeballs. I get a nutritionist, trainer, physio & access to any other specialist I need. Im a great believer in calling in the experts every once in a while-we do it in our homes so why not in our lives??
A few years ago I had CBT-Cognitive Behavioural Therapy. I wish everyone would do it! It gives you the skills to deal with stress, anxiety (I was having horrible anxiety attacks which were crippling me) and negativity. The brain is 70% negative as it is your bodies protector, so it over analise every thought-especially in females! I could never have got through the last 3 years without it, and im not ashamed to say I did it-best training I ever did.
Day 3 of detox done, gym done, playing with a 1 year old for a few hours done, so its off to bed. I sleep for 10 uninterrupted hours-bliss and the first one in a long long time.
So now its back to food-still healthy and being delivered so I don’t stray. The big weigh in. 5lbs off since last week Wooohoooo. So chuffed. Im feeling good, still a long way to go.
This week I got some sad news. Another special person lost to cancer too early. My heart goes out to you all, its the worst time. But all I can say is let it out-scream, shout, cry, laugh, but most of all remember they aren’t suffering anymore. Find a picture of them smiling and happy-look at it every day & smile back. Thats what they would want. Lots of tears today, i’m even sobbing watching Dolly at Glastonbury!! She was awesome btw! Guess its just time to let it all out, now where are my sunglasses……
MOT time-all my vital statistics taken. My body fat is 24%- 3 years ago it was 31%. Awful. My hips are too large I KNOW THAT! So a long way to go for the magic 20% body fat & correct waist to hip ratio but ive never felt more determined. The bad news is i have high cholesterol, so I have to cut out cheese. NO CHEESE. Surely thats against the law…..Wish me luck!!
Its time to get ready for the holibobs of a lifetime. Im off to a 5 star spa hotel in Italy to be revived, restored and recharged. Cant wait to tell you all about it.
I may come back a very different person, & who knows who I will meet. Its where George Clooney has a home so you never know….
Speak to you all in a fortnight!!
So here we are. D day. Time to hand back the computer, finish my expenses, see some friends, and then 4 months of me time. Meternity as I am calling it.
I know everyone thinks ‘Lucky Al’. But this isnt a holiday. Its time to draw a deep breath, pull out a blank sheet of paper, & rebuild life from almost scratch.
Why? Well, i am 39 years of age, an orphan, single & I have not been lucky enough to have children yet.
I have a fantastic set of friends, and an amazeballs career. So its not all doom and gloom.
But im absolutely bloody terrified of whats going to happen over the next 4 months. I have to face up to a few things-losing my parents, the two most precious people in my life who made me everything I am. I also have to take a good look at me and face a few home truths, never easy, & as you know I can be quite stubborn…
So I hope you can all join me through this blog, laugh & cry with me & at me, but where its going to end up who flippin well knows. Lets find out!! Now wheres my passport…..